Tag Archives: Hellman’s

Nobody Panic

Yes, it is another picture of my refrigerator contents. But at least this is still inside a working fridge.

And this moment is brought to you by Panic and Pride.

I’m on my own for supper tonight. Husband is still at the lake. Daughter worked the early car. Dog is with husband. So I decide to enjoy some homegrown ‘maters on a grilled burger and watch either Tender Mercies or Terms of Endearment. I watched Steel Magnolias bymyselfalone last night, and am still in the mood for more 1980s-style heart-sobbing, I guess.

I grilled the burgers, sliced the perfect July tomato, and reached into the refrigerator for the Hellman’s (for the last time, y’all, we don’t have DUKE’S up here). WH WHA WHAT? This isn’t happening. This is a dream. A nightmare. There’s only Miracle Whip! What would Ouizer and Clairee say? (I shudder.)

Better, what would M’Lynn do?

You know it: She’d make her own mayonnaise.